Trans Joy – They

Trans Joy is my weekly blog series celebrating the positive side of trans experiences, in an attempt to bring some balance to contemporary trans discourses. This week I’m talking pronouns!


I am generally pretty relaxed about my own pronouns, though obviously I always try to respect other peoples preferred pronouns and broader rights to self-identification. But for me “he” has never felt particularly dysphoric, when I present as high femme it feels weird to be referred to as “he”, but more in the sense that it’s so clearly inaccurate, rather than it feeling wrong and uncomfortable.


But sometimes pronouns can bring me gender euphoria. I am non-binary and genderfluid, and when I’m feeling particularly detached from gender, “they” can feel like affirmation. “They” feels like confirmation of my otherness to the gender binary, and “they” feels like validation of who I am.


So while “he” or “she” have never felt painful to me, at the right time “they” can feel like a loving embrace.


I hope you find some joy this week too ❤



Published by QuenbyWrites

I write about whatever captures my attention, focussing on my personal experiences. I'm mostly interested in gender, sexuality, and mental health. My experiences are shaped by being pansexual, polyamorous, non-binary, depressed, an intersectional feminist, and active in the BDSM community.

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